I got a papercut and I'm made out of meat!

don't try this at home https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYfkhdKcEiE

That'd make for a hell of a paper cut.

That's amazing. I'm impressed by the ingenuity of people making videos like this.

Obligatory https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/They're_Made_Out_of_Meat

you can cut wood with paper.

replace the blade on your tablesaw with a bit of paper and try it :)

This is why you don't wipe glass(es) with paper cloths, micro scratches will eventually make it look like sanded glass.